I really wish I had a Doula at my Birth, here's why...

When we settled into our then new home and I started planning my home water birth I knew I wanted a Doula to be part of my birthing care team.

I started searching for a Doula, I was even happy to have the support of a doula trainee. I couldn't find a Doula who would charge less than £250 to support at my home birth. We couldn't afford this, I was devastated and also a bit angry. I really missed the support of a Doula at my Birth, there was a definate role she would have fulfilled. * I am flexible with costing, discuss it with me *. 

I went into labour on a monday night, I was in my 40th week of pregnancy and had experienced 5 practice labours so dh and I knew it would be soon. In preparation for the upcoming birth and in order to get all his work done  dh worked extra late and went in extra early the monday I went into labour. Consequently he was bushed when he got home and in the early hours of tuesday morning I sent him to go catch some zzzzz's in preparation for the long labouring day ahead. At this point my midwife had come and gone, with some wise words basically letting me know that I needed to get a grip, this was just the beginning. Your midwife will most likely not be able to be with you in early labour and the Labour & Delivery of your hospital ward will send you home.

At this point let me say I found my early labour the hardest to deal with. I really could have done with a Doula to help me through early labour. I got through it but it was a bit lonely breathing through my contractions in a darkened room whilst dh got some much needed rest.

I think it is important for pregnant moms to bear in mind that your partner/mom/sister may not be able to give you the support you need at some point during your labour. This is not because they don't love you or don't want to, on the contrary I think its because they love you so much that they struggle to see you in labour pain and sometimes don't really know how to support you in fear of either angering you or somehow making it worse (Think about it, how many labours and births have they supported at, having a baby is not the same as supporting a mom have her own baby). A Doula on the other hand is more objective and intrinsically understands that labour and birth are a journey and can walk the road with you and offer you support in various ways without fear of reprisal. Plus Doulas have a much larger knowledge and experience base to work from, as well as tried and tested comfort measures. A Doula can also help by directing your birth partners to better support you.

Just a thought :)

Are you interested in finding out more about what part a Doula could play in your birthing support team? Drop me an email. Doulatam (at) gmail (dot) com

PS: I am based in West Lothian Scotland

It's not what you can do for your Doula, But what your Doula can do for you!

Doula - (doo-lah) - My interpretation of a Doulas place in the baby rearing team: Support and Love, a calm presence during your labour and a breastfeeding supporter backed up by lots of useful information and experience. They say it takes a village to raise a child, then every village should have a Doula.

Advantages of Doula Care:

"Birth companions (doulas are one type) may help with shorter labor, less medication, induction and augmentation of labor and fewer Caesarian deliveries. Newborns in supported births have lower rates of fetal distress or admission to neonatal intensive care units. More doula-supported women breastfed. Women reported greater self-esteem, less depression, higher regard for their babies and their ability to care for them and higher satisfaction with their partner.^[12][13] These results are similar to findings that support from a female relative during childbirth has similar effects.^[14]

One study found doula support without childbirth classes to be more helpful than childbirth classes alone, as measured by emotional distress and self-esteem four months after birth. Women in the doula-supported group reported their infants as less fussy than those without support.^{[15]" Wikipedia}


DoulaTam - more about me.

I did my doula training in 2007 in Johannesburg South Africa, I have had the privilege of supporting at 7 beautiful births. I am a breastfeeding supporter and have completed a lactation management course and La Leche League breastfeeding support class. 

In terms of personal experience, I had my baby at home in water in October of 2009, she was exclusively breastfed (ecological breastfeeding) for 7+ months and is still breastfeeding.

I live in West Lothian Scotland and am currently available to take on new clients. 

For further information or just a general chat contact me doulatam (at) gmail (dot) com